Darkness seeks to destroy….to come at me with all the pain and fear darkness is so famous for. A place where I feel nothing. God is not present in my senses….He is not there to be held within my heart as real. Senses so human must be removed. Impure loves, lusts, selfishness and hatred…all must go. My dreams, desires and personal plans. My hopes. My social circles. My daily pleasures and comforts. All must go. Deep into the grave of pain and crucifixion must I remain….bathed in burial linens until the time that I am set free…new….clean…His. And so…though it is painful…though it seems hopeless…I hold on. I hold on to Him. To what I cannot see. I cannot feel. To what I cannot know. Each day….another thing must go. Each day…a new loss. Yet this is His way. To see that which has been my dearest treasure taken from me. For only He can be my treasure. He is a selfish God who seeks to give me only Himself…and is jealous to give me nothing more….for in that place alone will I have rest. It is for my good He injures me. Spare me not…Lover of my soul….though I weep…I will find rest in You when the work is done.
Kris Fasse January 24, 2015